Knocked Up~ Pass the Prune Juice

That's right, I'm preggos and constipated. And I'm here to kick my classy blog up a notch. But first things first...



Thanks to the well wishes on Twitter. You guys are all really too cool to be reading my tweets. And if you aren't following these folks, you should be cause they were paying attention to me so they can't be all that bad, right? Oh, ehrr, wait. More importantly, if you are reading this right now and you aren't on Twitter, why the hell not?!? Just give in to the peer pressure like the rest of us muckety-mucks, k? And as far as cravings go, Ms. BlogNosh~ uhm, not-so-much. Just the "smell" of water brings on the waves of nausea. It would appear that this baby is going to beat me over the head with every last symptom in its arsenal.

To clear up a few things: No this was not planned. Who in their right mind plans to get pregnant while their hubby is away for 6 months, they are forced to live with their mom because her house sold too quickly and is supposed to be moving to Denver in a month but has no idea where yet and has still not told her job that she's leaving and is totally stressed out beyond belief? Did I mention that my genius 11-y.o. monkey managed to break her foot at summer camp? NOBODY in their right mind, THAT'S WHO.

Yes, hubby is ecstatic and overjoyed and will soon be fixed. But let this be a warning to all of you married couples who get comfortable thinking they are too old to worry about these things anymore, and thinking it's a blessing to have an only child who is spoiled rotten, and who decide to get their freak on way too many times when they mistakenly think they miss their displaced hubby and decide to show him the many ways you've missed him *which shall remain untyped here.* It's been said before, but it's worth repeating~ Sex and marriage just do not go together. Now pay more attention to your married friends who are bitching about their ungrateful spouse who has disgusting habits and how normal married couples only have sex once/year. During a full moon. When she is NOT ovulating for the love of humanity.

By the way, I hope I didn't shatter anyone's world view if you still believe the whole stork thing, but WARNING: Sex makes BABIES. There. My PSA is done. Go about your day. And yes, this blog is likely to to go totally batty because a little something else people conveniently forget about pregnancy... NINE MONTHS OF BEING SOBER. And you know sober and me just do not play nicely together. At this rate, the insanity might drive me to becoming democrat. heh. not. But having my snarky sister call me and ask how much of my wine cellar she has rights to now (cause she is keeping my beloveds for me while our household goods are in storage) might just be the tipping point. So not funny sis. If you don't mind, I'll now go back to reading this fun and engaging article that is just making me feel all kinds of warm and fuzzy inside. Prune Ice Cream & Prune Cupcake recipes to follow. And right now? I just threw up a little in my mouth.